Today sucked.

So today sucked. Now, I'm not the kind of person to complain whenever I have a bad day, but some days, so many things go wrong, it becomes almost comical and warrants being documented. Some days you are the dog and some days you are the hydrant, and today I was the hydrant in the worlds biggest dog park. Ironically, it's also worth noting that the entire time I've lived in this city, I've never really struggled with not having a car until I've needed to do things to move out of this city.

I woke up hungover. I went to Napa yesterday and I am well aware that this was completely self inflicted, so I won't dwell on this fact, and only am using it to add additional color to how miserable I was. I had already told work that I was coming in late today because I had a dentist appointment and then had to go to Berkeley for the second time to finish up my medical stuff for my visa because the first time I went, I forgot my passport, and apparently they need that.

So I headed to the dentist office to get two cavities filled. I brush my teeth 7+ times a day so I'm not happy about this but nonetheless, this was something I'd rather handle up front and before I go to Australia. The bad thing about this was the two cavities were on opposite sides of my mouth. One was in the top right, the other was in the bottom left. This meant they had to numb the two sides of my face, and meant I got to spend the rest of my day wandering around looking like a stroke victim.

So at this point, I had to take a bus, then the BART (basically a train) and then another bus to get to the Berkeley Medical Center. I should also note that it was raining all day today. I was wearing my flip flops with virtually no traction and while walking to the bus stop, I slipped pretty badly but somehow managed to not fall and just stubbed my toe. At this point I watched my bus go flying by me about 15 yards away. This was something that later developed into a bit of a pattern. I waited for about 15 more minutes for the next bus and got on. I took a seat next to an older Asian lady who kept looking at me funny. I mentally wrote this off as being a side effect of my stroke face and tried to ignore it. About ten minutes went by and I looked down at my foot and noticed there was a ton of blood dripping off of it. I somehow failed to notice when I stumbled that my foot had begun gushing blood and this Asian lady was terrified of me. Fortunately, I did have a band aid in my purse. This is the last point during the day anything remotely resembling good luck occurred.

I got to BART, bought $8 worth of rides to cover my going and returning trips and headed off to downtown Berkeley. I figured this should be a quick in and out situation. I go in, show them my passport, they do my chest X-ray and we're done. One thing worth mentioning about public transportation that is different than SF transportation is they do not give transfer passes. So it's $2 to ride the bus, and if you get off or switch buses, you're going to have to shell out another $2. So I catch my first bus to the medical center. Total spent on public transportation: $10. Upon arriving, they informed me that they would only give me a piece of paper to go to a different location and get my chest x-ray done, and then I need to bring back my films to this place in Berkeley. This requires me to go down the street into Oakland. This is where I should have seen things going down a bad road. At least the place was located on the same street. I was at 2624 Telegraph Avenue, and the other office was at 3300 Telegraph Avenue. Maybe I should have taken it as a warning sign when the receptionist told me that it was too far to walk and I was going to need to take another bus, even though the addresses would lead me to believe that the new location was only a block or two away.

I hopped on the bus (Total spent on public transportation: $12) and was on my way. I was riding for a bit when I looked out the window and noticed that I was somehow in the 6000 block of Telegraph Avenue. I panicked. How the hell did this happen? I hit the button and jumped off the bus. In the middle of Oakland. Crap. I didn't think that one all the way through. As I start to try to get my bearings and figure out how I ended up over 3000 address numbers away from where I'm supposed to be, I notice that the numbers are now going down. As I walk (in the same direction my bus was headed, mind you), I come upon the 5000's. At this point I realize that some mensa candidate that planned this road has the address numbers going up and then going right back down as you go further along. WTF? Who plans a city like that? I get to the next bus stop just in time to miss that bus, and I wait another 15 minutes to catch the next one. Total spent on public transportation: UGH, $14.

I get to the Oakland radiology center. As I walk to the front door, some guy yells 'Hey there beautiful baby. What you doin'?' Presumably this guy has a thing for women whose faces don't have full mobility. I immediately judge him. I go in for the chest X-ray and the male technician gives me a hospital gown with an open back to put on for the X-ray. I put it on and note that it is about as opaque as tissue paper. Modesty really isn't going to be an option here. I go back out to get the X-ray taken and the technician informs me that I haven't completely filled out some of the paperwork that I need to. I take it from him, put it on the table and lean forward to finish filling it out. Male technician is then treated to a peep show courtesy of the open back on my see-through hospital gown, ya know, just in case it wasn't already see through enough.

So I finally get out of there trying to piece together what's left of my dignity, and hop a bus back to the Berkeley Medical Center (Total spent on public transportation: $16). I drop off my chest X-ray and at this point, am completely out of $1 bills because I've spent so much riding around Berkeley and Oakland. I try to stop by a Subway restaurant, but they apparently also have a shortage of ones and won't break a larger bill for me. I then go to a 7-11, where the guy says he will break it, but I need to buy something for him to be able to open the cash register. I buy a candy bar which at this point, I'm attributing its cost to my total public transportation spend: $19.09.

So I sit at the bus stop waiting for my bus. I see one bus go by in the opposite direction. Then another. Then a third one. I stick my head out from under the bus cover to see if I can spot my bus and BAAM, a bird shits on me. Why not, bird? Everything else has today.

When all is said and done, I finally get to work at 4:05 PM. I'm a little lighter across the board. I have a little less money in my wallet. A little less skin on my foot. A little less dignity. However, I couldn't be happier to be back in SF and I know that even though today sucked, it's going to make tomorrow that much better in comparison. If nothing else, at least tomorrow my face will work better. :)

2 Weeks!

So literally 2 weeks from today, I will be on a plane to my new life. I have so much to do here that I haven't even let myself start to think about all of the things I'm going to have to do when I get there: Find an apartment, get a bank account, get a new orthodontist. Fortunately, I have my wonderful brother Ben headed to SF on Tuesday and I'm SO excited to see him (and have him help me with everything). Based on my recent conversations with Ben, I don't think he realizes he's flying directly into indentured servitude.

Ben: so whose picking me up from the airport?

Emily: Um, super shuttle?

Ben: hahahaha
hmm last time you needed a ride from the airport i think i got you a limo... im just saying

I essentially plan on handing him my credit card and a list of shit that I need done during the day. Cause what are younger siblings for if not to completely exploit them? I didn't spend the better half of my childhood convincing him that I was his superior for nothing. It's time to cash in on those years of manipulation and sibling torture.

Ben is actually on his way to Taiwan and then Cambodia to teach English to kids who look different (his quote, not mine) while I head down to Australia. I do wonder if there isn't some genetic driver that makes both of us so eager to explore the world and see everything it has to offer. Though obviously Ben and I have found different means to reach the same end.

I am excited about this cause over the last few years I found myself very jealous of Ben and his adventures in Southeast Asia, while I had my corporate job selling pay-per-click ads, however I've always felt my job was too good to justify leaving it to travel with no real direction or end in sight. Ultimately, I am glad that I didn't ever run off on a whim and leave everything since it is my corporate job that offered the opportunity for me to live in a different country. Not only that, our Sales Conference this year is supposed to be held in Tokyo, so I am beyond excited that I'm going to be able to go there. Also, for the last few years, all I've wanted to do is visit Thailand. I'm not totally sure why. I got hooked on the idea after I saw the move 'Brokedown Palace' which if you have ever seen it, you may wonder how that is what made me decide I want to go to this place. (The plot of the movie is about how two American girls get drugs planted on them and wind up in a Thai prison). Anyway, I digress, my point being I'll finally be closer and have that be much more accessible to me. I also am dying to visit Fiji, Bali, Indonesia, Malaysia, Singapore, and everywhere else. Though I've always loved traveling, the last few years I have become very complacent and not done as much as I would have liked. As San Francisco started to feel more and more like home, I got more and more comfortable here and had a harder time getting off my ass and going on an adventure.

I think this new adventure in Australia, which I'm sure won't feel remotely like home for some time, will give me the jump start I've been looking for. Even in the months since I've found out I'm going to be going, I've started to identify things that I want to start doing to become more of the person I want to be. I'm looking forward to this like a fresh start. Not that I have anything to run away from or that there is anything I dislike about who I am now, but there is something invigorating and refreshing about staring at the blank page in front of you and knowing that you control your own destiny about where you go from here.

I rock at bowling! Who knew?

I won three out of the four games we played yesterday at bowling. Turns out I'm quite good when I've had a few beers. Also, check out the shape these beer bottles came in. Awesome way to spend a Sunday night!

One weekend down, two more to go...

So I'm starting to enter my final stretch in San Francisco. I only have two more full weekends left, and I feel like I have so much to do, but really a lot of the work is kind of taken care of. I'm lucky enough to have people taking over my apartment who are buying most of my furniture. The moving company that is moving some of my stuff comes here and does all the packing for me. So really, I just have to get some boxes, ship some stuff to my moms, change my address for my banking stuff and my mail forwarding and I guess that's it. Maybe it's just the gravity of the whole moving situation that has me feeling like there is a lot to do. It's just the stress of the fact that I'm moving.

Just an update on what's been going on the last few days in my life, the Gators lost, though I was able to get a great view of them losing in the office where we hooked up a TV to stream the game live into the office.



Friday I had a little going away party at one of my favorite San Francisco bars, Kozy Kar. This bar has water beds, the floor and bar is shellacked with centerfolds from 70's and 80's playboy and is just generally a great time and a typical San Francisco experience. http://www.mazeltovproductions.com/ I wonder if Sydney will have bars like this... My coworker Dave somehow managed to break a table here by belly flopping on it (he did this on a cop car in college too).

Saturday I went to Shirley's apartment in the morning where she cooked us all breakfast, and then went across the street to Lafayette park where I played with some dogs. Though all of these seem like mundane details, they are the things that I love doing and make me a little sad as I know things are going to be different very soon. I love living so close to Shirley and Lisa and will miss going over to their apartment to eat their food, drink their booze or just do nothing. They are amazing friends and I do worry about staying in touch since I know from moving previously that some friendships inevitably drop off when you move. Though someone recently reminded me that in a way, it is a true test of who are your real friends anyway, as the people I've managed to stay in touch with from all of the places I've lived are unquestionably my closest friends, it is still sad to think about. I will definitely miss living right across the street from a beautiful park where I can go at any time and get my dog fix (since I still don't see a dog in my future any time soon. Still not responsible enough. Breathe easy, Dad.)

The San Francisco weather has been absolutely perfect this week which naturally hasn't made it any easier to really accept that I'm leaving but I'm pretty sure it won't be too bad in Sydney, either. This evening I'm going bowling with some friends so I'm looking forward to that as well.

In a way, moving is making me take more advantage of every moment here with my friends and just doing stuff because I know that my remaining time here is limited. It's really a lesson in how I probably should be living my life anyway because realistically all of our time alive is limited and we should be taking advantage of every second we have, but it's not something many of us do or actively recognize. I hope I'm able to carry this attitude and lesson with me to Sydney and really try to make the most of every second I have.

Just a beautiful San Francisco day...

Since my days are limited now in San Francisco, I'm trying to take as much advantage of the time I have left. For example, last week I finally made it to the California Academy of Sciences nightlife which is something I've been dying to do for awhile now. Today, it was absolutely beautiful in the city so my coworker, Lisa, and I decided to take our lunch out to the Embarcadero. Fortunately, todays lunch was also in honor of St. Patricks day and included a little hard cider and Guinness mixed with champagne. To share a little piece of it with you, I've attached a picture above and below I've attached a video I took with my phone to give full perspective.

Happy St. Patricks Day!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lW-rbb_dgA

My first visitor from the U.S.!

Well no sooner did I start to let myself get a little sad about my upcoming move did I immediately get a piece of news that brought me right back to being super excited. Pat is going to be coming to Australia in June for a few weeks, and he's going to try out for some rugby teams out there, which if he gets on, he will probably stay for the whole summer. I'm SO excited to already know that it won't be too long once I get there before I am seeing a familiar face from home.

Some of the back story on Pat is he is actually somewhat responsible for me even being at Google in the first place. He went to Stanford for undergrad and grad school and when I came back from Boston, having quit my job and having no immediate prospects, I ran into him at the beach and he offered to forward my resume to a buddy of his who works for Google. Obviously one thing led to another and I ended up getting the job, which is a job I probably wouldn't have applied for otherwise since I'd never even visited San Francisco prior to moving here so certainly had no intentions of trying to move out here. It is this job that is ultimately taking me to Sydney, where the first person from home I see will likely be Pat, so it's kinda cool how the whole thing is coming full circle.

Ticket booked!

I booked my one way ticket to Sydney today. It definitely was bittersweet and I found I was much more sad than I expected to be when I did. Don't get me wrong. I am totally elated about the possibilities and the unknown that lies within this next chapter of my life. I'm just finding myself more torn about this move than I ever have been before.

At first I didn't get why I was more upset this time than I have been all of the other times I've moved. I mean, I left Boston, left Sarasota, left Sydney (round 1). I guess I thought I was kind of immune to the moving thing. I have friends around the world, and though I miss them, I've always felt that there was a lot more value to be derived in life through traveling and living as many places as possible and seeing as many things as possible than there would be to stay in just one place. Maybe its because when I left everywhere else, I felt more ready to leave or I had gotten to a point where I felt I had gotten everything out of those places that I was going to.

Maybe it's because I have formed so many amazing friendships here, and I know from my past experiences that as hard as you try, some of those do end up falling by the wayside when you aren't physically in the same place. Maybe it's because there are still possibilities and unknowns in San Francisco that I don't feel like I've totally explored. Maybe it is cause I finally had felt like I'd put some roots down in the Bay Area and now I'm ripping them up.

Though it is somewhat sad, I am also aware that I was reaching a point of almost complacency in my life. I was very comfortable in my day to day, in my job and with all of my friends. I think this move is crucial to ensure that I don't become complacent in my monotonous routine, and that I don't just settle for what is comfortable. I've always wanted a lot out of life, cause I've known that life has a lot to offer and you just have to go after it. I know that every sad feeling and apprehension I have about this is just more reason I need to be going after it, since if I'm scared, it means I have that much more to learn from it and to grow once I actually do it.

I do find it funny that it ended up being Sydney that I am going back to. When I left in 2006, I remember thinking that might be the last time I'd ever be in Australia. Growing up, I recall having an Australian pen pal, named Opal, and I remember planning a fake vacation to Australia as a school project. My favorite animal growing up was a koala bear and I still wear my opal necklace daily. I don't know what any of this means, or if there really is any rhyme or reason to any of it, or if its just coincidence and dumb luck, but one way or another, it's official. I am going. This should be interesting... :)


“There is no time for cut-and-dried monotony. There is time for work. And time for love. That leaves no other time.” -Coco Chanel